Pain is temporary, failure lasts forever

Lean, agile living for the running mother of Peter

2007-06-09

D-day Focusing Running Crashing surviving

My first aim today was to make it through the race. Second aim was if I would break, I would do it in time. Well, I made the second goal. A sunny hot day. I took the morning and lucnh just focusing on the task. My husband supplied me with wonderful lunch. Then off to the Stadium of Stockholm. Focusing. Starting. I drank so much fluid I possibly could. WHich was a good thing. The first two drink stations were a mess and I hardly got anything to drink. The heat was terrible so I kept with the 4.45 crew (not exactly my original goal but it was a really hot day). After the first 10 k everything started lightning up and I felt this is going to be a nice run. What if I get a lousy time? It's just fun watching everyone. Listening to all the cheers. Enjoying the party. I took my time at all the drink stands but made it to the 4.30-pacers.

Found my son and husband at the 1,7 k. I felt wonderful. Then, it must have been just some hundred meters after I talked to my husband. The guy in front of me slowed down and I wasn't paying attention. I had to fast move sideways. I didn't fall but my knee got twisted. Perhaps I made a bad step. Don't remember, because I wasn't paying much attention to the small incident. After some meters though, my knee started hurting. At first, not so much, then a lot. I saw the stadium, was happy that the best guys hadn't passed me on their second lap. I was hoping to do a good secound lap. But my knee was really hurting.

When I passed the 2.1 marker I started thinking. What the f**k am I doing? This isn't the regular knee ache you can get when you put in some miles. This feels much different. If I run 20 k on this I might never run again. I stopped. But, what about walking. I should be able to make it walking. But what will that prove and if my knee is bad it might get worse. So, I turned back. On the first step I could hardly believe the pain. I actually shed some tears. I had to walk back 3 km and those were more painful than the previous 21... The wonderful medical staff took good care of me and stabilized my knee. A ligament was probably injured but not off. I made a good call. So home I went and the pain persisted. I never once regretted my decision. What did I want to prove today? That I can run marathon? Why, I've already done that!? To prove I'm in good shape? I'm in good shape. I run 21 km and felt good. That I am stupid? No, not being stupid is what I proved today. Now, it will be some exercise free days/weeks and no more marathons this year.

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2 Comments:

Anonymous Mikke said...

Trist - men ett mycket klokt beslut. Det kommer fler lopp!!!

Jag anmälde mig till Lidingö igår, och hoppas få sällskap så du får se till att vara bra till dess!

June 10, 2007 at 9:33 AM  
Blogger Peter's mommy said...

jag ska vara bra tills dess. gör mest ont på nätterna.

June 11, 2007 at 2:32 PM  

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